I temporarily deactivated my Facebook page because I’m reaching a point where honestly, I’m just fucking over it. I think I need to do some soul searching and really try to decide how much longer I want to keep this whole ‘Ashlee Adams’ thing going, and if I stop it, what the hell am I gonna do? Hmm. I do know that right now I am happy, and that much of the time being ‘Ashlee’ is becoming very draining. It’s coming to a point now where I feel like I literally can’t post ANYTHING on Facebook, Twitter, IG without being told I’m wrong, without being criticised, without being called an attention seeking slut whore bitch ugly fat blah blah whatever. I’m just over it. Yesterday I made what I thought was a nice post about things I am thankful for considering I now live in the USA and it was Thanksgiving, and I basically got torn to shreds all over the internet for being a ‘fucking yank’ and “Umm you’re Australian” and so forth. BECAUSE I WROTE A POST ABOUT BEING THANKFUL FOR THINGS. I made the same post on my private, personal Facebook and received nothing but genuine sentiments from friends and family saying how happy they are to see me so happy.
I think I need to reassess what I want from this. Updating my Facebook isn’t fun any more, I just get angry because so many people criticise and bitch and it’s retarded. If I keep doing it, I probably need to try to emotionally disassociate from it, because right now I probably share too much of the real me on there which makes me more vulnerable to idiots. And it’s not like I’m getting offended or upset or anything, I’m just getting fucking ANNOYED, and I can absolutely never ever post on there to say that I’m annoyed because that just starts a shitstorm of “Well what do you expect blah blah” which in turn makes me fucking rage. Trying to manage almost 70,000 people on my own is a lot harder than I thought it’d be.
I dunno, maybe I just need a break. I really do not know. I’m really happy right now and being told one hundred times a day that you’re wrong and being put down constantly just seems pointless now. Life would be so much easier if people would just fucking subscribe to the idea of, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”